Adoption can be a beautiful thing. The question that most adoptive parents have, however, is when should they talk to their kids about adoption. Psychology Today offers some tips on how to speak to your child about adoption.
Adoption talks generally rely on your child’s age.
When your child is a toddler
As a child between the ages of two and four, your child may not fully understand the concept of adoption. When raising an adopted child, you have to remember that your child will have some curiosity over his or her birth parents in the future. You do not want to treat the subject as a taboo. This is why introducing it early can help for the future.
For toddlers, you need to be able to reassure that you love them as much as you would have if you were their birth parent. You need to remain positive about the adoption and help your toddler feel comfortable in the knowledge and confident that you love him or her.
When your child is ready to ask questions
The older your child is, the more likely he or she is going to ask you questions. While your children may bring up questions that you never thought of, it does help to prepare. If you cannot answer, then it is okay to tell your child that you would like to think about it so that you can give the best answer. You still want to make sure that you do answer all of the questions. You can share the circumstances of the child’s adoption.
Do not bad talk the birthparents. Often, children will start to wonder if they have the same bad characteristics as their birthparents.