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What To Tell Your Adopted Children and How to Treat Them

April 6, 2022

There are reasons for hiding that you are not related to your adoptive children. Such ideas might make you think that avoidance is the easier path.

There is no legal obligation to tell your adopted children the truth. That said, staying honest about their adoption is a better decision.

What to say to adopted children

Start talking with your dependents about their adoption from a young age. That way, they will not experience a disturbing shock later in life.

Never speak negatively about the birth parents of your adoptees. Provide reassurance that adoption only means more people love you.

Refrain from expressing that they are lucky to have you in their lives. Such talk could make them think your love hinges on particular behaviors. Instead, work to create an atmosphere where adoptees feel comfortable discussing their reality.

How to deal with adopted children who want to meet their birth parents

According to the Search Institute, 65% of adopted adolescents want to find their birth mother and father. This desire is both healthy and normal. Still, children lack the right to a relationship with their biological parents. You could also have reasons for preventing them from getting together.

Be honest about your feelings, but be gentle. Remember that many states have organizations that help connect adoptees with birth parents. There is little you can do if they wish to use such services once they are adults.

Adopted children are bound to be curious about their histories. Prevent emotional conflict by being honest from the start. No matter what they decide or how they feel, let them know you will love them forever.

Practice Area:   
Domestic Adoption

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